HOLDING SPACE FOR HOPE

By Lori Carmody

It is 3 days until an election that has ignited our Nation.  More of us have been having political conversations than ever before in recent history.  I find that a refreshing and positive take away from what otherwise has been an awful political season.

As I reflect on what has transpired, I would like to suggest a few tasks for us to consider along with voting:

1. We, as a nation, brought forth two deeply flawed individuals for the highest elected office in our country.  That says something about all of us.  It is my hope that we can begin to deeply ponder where we need to grow individually so that the collective whole may rise to higher standards in the future. 

Reflection :  What does “one Nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all” mean to me personally?  How do I listen to God’s invitation to remember that I am loved and created for this moment, this time and this country in which I live.

2. No matter what political party we identify with (or whether we choose to not identify with one) we are likely to have mixed feelings and some regrets on Wednesday morning, November 9^th.  I remember being so very sad after the election where Washington State voted to accept the measure called “Death with Dignity."  I was listening to the radio that morning when it was suggested to plant some spring bulbs, remembering that, with God, there is always hope.  I went out that day and bought some daffodil bulbs.  As I was down on my knees planting each bulb I whispered, “With God, all things are possible.”  (Matt 19:26). 

May I suggest that we buy some spring bulbs and get them in the ground this week?  I have purchased some crocus bulbs.  No matter who wins our presidential and state elections, God has this!  Take hope!!  The flowers will bloom in the spring and they will remind us what the words of Jeremiah 29 proclaim, “I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord.  Plans for a future and a hope.” 

Reflection:  What does it mean for me to be a person of hope?  Is there a “bulb” -  be it an actual flower bulb or a song, verse, photograph, action - that reminds me of hope?  How can I let it inform me today?

3. I have intentionally made it a point to talk with people on both sides of the aisle.  I was seeking to understand politically why choices were being made as well as I wanted to listen to people’s heads and hearts about what was impacting them personally as the election season was getting more and more heated.  I believe there is going to be deep grief in some of us or our neighbors after the results come in.  We need to “hold space” for our neighbors as they sort through their thoughts and feelings.  I was sent a fantastic article a while back.  It gives lovely advice on how to listen well.  I encourage you to read it.  http://upliftconnect.com/hold-space/

Being a spiritual director for over 20 years, I know that grief has its own time line.  I hope that we can be present to one another for however long it takes to grieve this electoral season.  Individually we need to heal and we, as God’s people, must hold one another tenderly moving forward.   

Reflection:  “If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other”  ~ Mother Teresa  What am I feeling as I reflect on this quote today?

If we are dismayed with the electoral process, devastated by the results, noticing that people we know are upset, bummed out about one of the proposition that didn’t go our way, or simply exhausted by the past couple months of commercials, I will end with the prayer by Henri Nouwen (that I also have now in the Bold Faith portion of the blog).  “If life knocks you on your knees, and it will, why not stay there?” 

Thanks for joining me on the blog today.

Lori

PS  I want to thank Johanna and her daughter (who I don’t even know but who graciously sent the Holding Space article to her mom for me).  Because of both of you, all my readers are blessed!  On this same note, thank you to all of you who have forwarded my blog onto others encouraging them to sign up.  I so appreciate you!  Blessings. 

PRAYER STARTER # 4

Please reflect on this photograph and let it lead you into prayer.
May you find that imagination and creativity walk alongside you as you hold the image.

Each month I will share with you one reflection that the photograph inspires.

IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO SUBMIT A PRAYER, POEM, OR REFLECTION (& I hope you do) PLEASE EMAIL IT TO ME AT Lori. Carmody@outlook.com

PRAYER STARTER # 3 
This is a selection from what was submitted in response to Prayer Starter # 3 (below)

Thank you, Oh Lord, for driving me safely so far.  There is a long, unknown road yet to travel but I thank you in advance for driving me safely along.  I pray that I don't decide to take the wheel, perhaps detouring unnecessarily.  Please drive me as we make a prayerful decision on upcoming plans.  In your good Name I thank you.
~ Anonymous

Note:  Deep gratitude to all who submitted prayers for Prayer Starter # 1-3.  I want to remind you that prayers, poems and reflections may be emailed to me with the request that I post them with your names or initials or anonymously.  Again, thank you!

Thanks for reading.
Lori

SALTWATER GOSPEL

 By Lori Carmody

When life has pushed hard on your body and soul, where do you go for grounding, restoration, and rejuvenation?  Many of us turn to prayer -  our daily practice, our refuge, our last resort.  And yet, if asked, who of us would be able to define prayer and why have we come to rely on it?  Do we pray in order to get what we want or in hopes that prayer will change what we desire so that we are at peace with whatever happens to be the outcome? 

What if neither of these are the goal of our prayer?  What if, instead, we pray because we have found that prayer changes us as we engage in turning our stubborn will over to something larger than our individual self.  Perhaps we have found that prayer helps us move from an “I” to “we” point of view and that wider vantage point is attractive to us. 

I love to pray in the quiet of an adoration chapel.  It soothes my frazzled soul from the busyness of everyday life.  However, when I find myself not grounded, overly emotional, and in need of guidance to know what the next best thing is for me to do, I head to Lake Kachess.  Dangling my feet in the cold, clear water and gazing on the tall trees and rugged mountains allows me to let go of my need to control and enables my thoughts to move from my small world of concerns to broader horizons.  Somehow in that time at the lake my selfishness diminishes and God’s beauty of creation grows so that once again in my mind and heart – and especially my will - God is God and I am not.  I am able to consecrate my whole being – needy, sinful, fearful, loving, capable, my all – over to the One who is my home beyond this home.  I walk away remembering that I am sustained in Grace and that I don’t walk alone – ever!  God is with me.

I also become aware that God is with each of us – always! And we are all connected to one another.  It isn’t me/my/I.  That illusion melts away and I re-awaken to the collective "we" who are traveling together on this journey called life. 

Where do you go to be reminded of the grace of your holy purpose beyond the grind of everyday life?  Does your schedule allow you time to occasionally be in that space – be it at the ocean, in the woods, on your back porch, in your favorite rocking chair, soaking in a bathtub,  …..?  If not, please remember that prayer is mysteriously transformative. 

What adjustments might you make to your schedule this week so that you can be changed into the person God has intended you to be?

Today, as I sit at the water’s edge writing this reflection, my prayer for you and for me is that each of us may find places and times to connect deeply to the reality beyond us.  My hope is that we find moments where we are “as close to God as we can get” for surely from that place we will emerge changed by God’s transforming Grace.   

Please enjoy the Eli Young Band’s new song, Saltwater Gospel.  Although Lake Kachess isn’t saltwater, this song touches on the holiness I feel at the water’s edge. 

https://www.google.com/?gws_rd=ssl#q=saltwater+gospel

Thanks for reading.

Lori

THE SOFTENING OF SUFFERING

By Lori Carmody

Have you ever accompanied someone as they suffered in pain?  I am not talking about the “skinned knee that will be better in a couple days kind of hurt.”  No.  I am referring to the type  pain, be it physical, emotional, mental, spiritual, or economic that takes a hold of a person and doesn’t let go. 

Recently I walked along-side of my uncle as he suffered with nerve damage with resulting pain that shot through his back and legs.  Medication only took the edge off.  Surgical procedures were ineffective.  Pain persisted.

Whether we are basically healthy with an occasional bout of pain or ill with an on-going medical condition, most of us have battles we face.  It’s just the human condition.

In my uncle’s case, he didn’t want to be constantly complaining or to be a burden to his family.  Just like with my uncle, our aches and pains are, for the most part, suffered in silence as well.  

What, then, are we to do other than to stay silent and suffer in pain, when the best medicine has to offer isn’t enough for us or those we love?  Where do we turn for strength and a dose of courage?  For each of us the answers may be unique for our particular personality.  Yet, there very well may be three concepts that together we can consider for sustenance.

• We can bring our requests to God.  No thought, prayer, petition, desire, or wish is too small or insignificant when brought before God. Nor is there anything too large for which to seek God’s help.  We make God small when we limit the help we will ask for by thinking we shouldn’t bother God with something too small or by assuming God isn’t interested in our personal lives.  We can and should ask God for anything we want and need. Putting our hopes and dreams into God’s hands and knowing we are heard by a loving Presence is doing something.  It is trusting God and it is caring for you and your loved ones.
• In many conversations with my uncle, he expressed the difficulty of living with acute, chronic pain.  Yet each time he shared about this, he’d follow that up by saying that when it got unbearable, he would “offer it up” to the good Lord to use his suffering to bless his family, especially those who were in battles of their own.  He wanted grace to pour over them as he continued to pray through his pain with submission.  We too can suffer for others whenever we silently take our pain and offer it to God, willingly accepting it on behalf of others.
• Often times with chronic pain we find it easier to shut out the world including shutting down our emotions around the pain and all that it has taken from us.  A recent quote by Kayla McClurg on suffering struck me as powerfully insightful: “If we don’t shut down, suffering softens us; carves out more capacity to receive what God wants to give.”  Although a more difficult path, the softening that occurs as we suffer and the gifts from God are without question.  This is one of the primary reasons for wholeheartedly opposing euthanasia.  These gifts are given and shared not only with those who are in pain but with the community supporting them. 

We have available to us the capacity to open ourselves to the softening grace of experiencing more and more of who we are by entering into every part of what life has to offer.  The choice is ours.  Will we enter fully?  Even our pain and suffering?  Blessings await us, if we have eyes to see and a heart open to receive the gift.

Thanks for reading.

Lori

BEHOLD YOUR MOTHER

By Lori Carmody

With news coming out in the Catholic world from Buenos Aires, Argentina announcing that the Marian apparition (Our Lady of the Rosary of San Nicolas) has been officially approved by Bishop Hector Cardelli of San Nicolas (http://www.catholicnewsagency.com/news/a-marian-apparition-has-been-approved-in-argentina---and-its-a-big-deal-31979/) it got me thinking about Mary.  When I was a little girl I remember during the summertime wanting to get done with dinner in record time so I could go back outside to play with my friends.  However, my mom would keep my dad, sister, and me around the kitchen table after we were done eating so we could all say the Rosary.  My mother had a special connection with Mary and she wanted us to develop a similar bond.  You never saw two young girls recite prayers so quickly as those evenings when 50 Hail Marys, 5 Our Fathers and 5 Glory Be’s were the hinge-pins between dinner and play!

In talking with friends who attend places of worship other than Catholic, I hear that Mary seldom comes up for them. That is not true for Catholics.  In our tradition, Mary is mentioned and celebrated throughout the year.  She holds a place of high honor.   

In my own life, I would describe Mary much as I would explain my relationship with my own mother.  I went to my mom when I was happy, sad, confused, alone, excited to share news…in other words basically any time I needed someone to confide in and to have my back.  Often I would ask my mom to pray for my family, friends, and co-workers.  I never left a conversation with her without feeling reassured that she had taken whatever was on my mind and heart to God.  In December of 2000, my mom passed away.  I continued to talk to her at times such as these but the consolation I felt wasn’t there like it used to be.  It was then that I began my search for Mary, blessed mother of Jesus.  She was who my mother had turned to for comfort and strength most of her adult life.  Perhaps the same would be true for me.

In the 16 years that I have invited God to reveal Mary to me, I have been surprised by the number of times and ways that blessings have shown up.  No, I have not seen apparitions and am wary of those who proclaim that they have.  However, I, like with my own mother, feel as though I never leave a conversation with Mary without feeling she has taken whatever is on my mind and heart to God.  

 Also, I have read the story of St. Bernadette at Lourdes, France (http://www.catholic.org/saints/saint.php?saint_id=1757) and have had relatives who have made pilgrimages to the grotto.  One of my cousins feels for certain that she received a small but definite healing from the water at Lourdes and I trust that this is so.  Catholic teaching does not require members to believe one way or another on either apparitions or miracles yet stories from people of deep faith are convincing to me. 

In everyday life, we often feel as though no one can fully understand what we are struggling with.  Yet, meditating on the life of Mary and her life in Christ has shown me how this feeling is limiting grace.   When those we love are being bullied, Mary understands how it feels to watch in horror.  Her son was unfairly judged and ridiculed.  When we question some of our church leaders and occasionally have trouble feeling at peace with some of decisions they are making, Mary must have been in our shoes as her leaders were meeting to discuss what to do with her son.  When someone in our family dies and we are in a daze wondering how this could have happened and how our life can go on, imagine how Mary must have felt.  When we pray and beg and ask God for something and it seems as though the answer is “no”, Mary too received such an answer when her beloved son asked for “the cup to pass” from him and it did not. 

Mary is in heaven.  We can be assured that not only does she hear our prayers but she takes every one of them to God on our behalf.  

I am not qualified to answer whether the Our Lady of the Rosary of San Nicolas apparition is authentic or not.  The ground I can safely stand on is that Mary has been a holy path leading me to a wider, more expansive experience of God.  Her message to me has consistently been one of prayer, peace, forgiveness and devotion to God.  My discernment with Our Lady of the Rosary of San Nicolas is the same as in my own journey of faith.  If it leads me deeper into the loving arms of God and service to those around me, most assuredly it is a message I need to pay attention to.

Note:  I would be remiss if I wrote a blog about Mary, mentioning my dear mother, and didn't add to it my mom's favorite prayer of intercession.  In loving memory of Agnes Zirkle and the example of faith she was not only to our family but to countless others:

THE MEMORARE

Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary that never was it known that anyone who fled to Thy protection, implored Thy help, and sought Thy intercession was left unaided.  Inspired with this confidence, I fly unto Thee, O Virgin of virgins, My Mother!  To Thee I come; before Thee I stand, sinful and sorrowful.  Oh Mother of the Word Incarnate!  Despise not my petitions, but, in Thy mercy, hear and answer me.  Amen.

Thank you for reading this week.  

Lori

PRAYER STARTER #3

Please reflect on this photograph and let it lead you into prayer.  
May you find that imagination and creativity walk alongside you as you hold the image.  

Each month I will share with you one reflection that my photograph inspired.  

              IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO SUBMIT A PRAYER, POEM, or REFLECTION
              (and I hope you do)
               PLEASE EMAIL IT TO ME @ Lori.Carmody@Outlook.com

PRAYER STARTER #2 (Dated June 9, 2016)

This is a selection from what was submitted in response to Prayer Starter # 2 (below).

"Even as I hide in the shadows of despair I feel you with me, O God, waiting beside me until I am ready.  Then, like a precious friend, you gently lead me into the light again."  
- DJ (Renton, WA)

Note:  Deep gratitude to all who submitted prayers for Prayer Starter 1 & 2.  I want to remind you that prayers, poems and reflections may be emailed to me with the request that I post them with your names, initials or anonymously.  Again, thank you. 

Thanks for reading.  

4th OF JULY .... A GOOD TIME TO LISTEN

By Lori Carmody

I was on my way to a birthday celebration with a dear friend when we began talking about whether we wanted to let the evening delve into politics.  We knew there would be people on both ends of the political spectrum attending the dinner.  Even the two of us saw such hot topics as the race to the white house, gun legislation, the minimum wage debate, what falls under the umbrella of pro-life and other subjects much differently.  We decided to share our thoughts and opinions on the car ride and if we could listen respectfully and understand one another during our 15 minutes alone, then together we would be able to facilitate the discussion if it came up with the others later that evening.  I am happy to report that we survived the ride and even enjoyed the dialog!

This Monday our country celebrates 4th of July.  It’s a day for liberals and conservatives, republicans and democrats, young and old, rich and poor, our many races, religions, and diversities of all  kinds to come together to celebrate our heritage.  Will that happen at picnics, in parks and at family gatherings or will we take the opportunity to cause further division in our land by how we talk or not talk with one another?

I choose to conduct myself on the 4^th of July as the role models below have demonstrated in the lives they have lived:

Supreme Court Justices Ruth Bader Ginsburg and Antonin Scalia could not have been more divergent in their presence on the Supreme Court.  Ginsburg is as staunch a liberal as Scalia was a conservative.  However, they respected one another’s opinions and it was common knowledge that they were best friends.  How often today do we hear of people refusing to even speak to those with opposing views?  What ever happened to lively discussions that made both sides consider the topic of discussion leaving after hearing one another’s point of view having expanded their lens on what they were discussing?  In the words of Saint Bernadette, “My job is to inform, not to convince.”  What if, perhaps, we simply inform the people around us of our thoughts and let them freely choose to agree or disagree?  And then if, in turn, we hear what they have to say that will inform us.  Aren’t we both the wiser for listening?  Comedian Dick Cavett was known to have said, “It’s the rare person who wants to hear what he doesn’t want to hear.”  Let’s strive for rarity.   

This week in the Catholic Church we celebrated the Feast Day of Saint Peter and Saint Paul (June 29^th).  Although they were both giants in our church history, it is common knowledge that they were definitely not besties.  They had different personalities and as such, lived out their respective calls to ministry in their own individual ways.  God used both of them to build up the church.  They did not have to have the same approach to problems in order to be effective.  They also didn’t need to have the same gifts in order to get the job done.  They only needed to have a heart open to serve.    Perhaps this weekend we can stop criticizing how another is going to run the country, lead the church, make future rulings in the court and instead try to see how we all are on the same road of wanting churches to flourish and our country to be a place where America truly is “where God sheds His grace on thee…”

The Prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi is one of my favorites.  In it we ask God the favor of granting “that I may not so much seek to be understood as to understand.”   Blessed are we who are brave enough to live into these words.  

Thanks for reading.