REARVIEW MIRROR GRATITUDE

 It has been almost two years since I have regularly blogged.  After the challenges I faced in 2018 with my eyes and then in 2019 with my snowmobile accident, it took a long time for me recoup and to appreciate, in the depth of my being, the tender care God had granted me. 

    ~  When I was at the end of my abilities and needed to depend on others occasionally for sight, shopping or even at times for putting on my socks, God was showing me that He was near with a fierce love. 

    ~ When I was frustrated at myself and/or my condition, God brought compassionate visitors who shared with me insight into how to ask for what I needed, to better give up control of what I had no control over, to add the word "yet" to the end of my sentence when I would say, "I can't do this", and to remind me that vulnerability is courageous.

~  When I could not attend church services, I did less and God spoke more. 

For most of the two years of recuperation, I sat in a comfy chair and visited with friends and family when they stopped by.  During those visits, two symbols that were on the shelf opposite my chair, spoke to me ~ a small pot of yellow flowers that brought me such joy and a prayer card that centered me on God's mercy.   Although I wasn't able to give much joy nor mercy to my visitors, they showered me with both!  Not only that, our "Father who sees in secret" knows our hearts ~ yours and mine.  He knew that I yearned not only to be whole but to be His servant of mercy and joy to those around me.  He held me close to His grace for over two years until I could once again sense His loving embrace. 

Your 2020 may have challenged you in ways beyond what you thought you could endure.  Quite possibly your trials may still continue today.    

In the midst of mine, had I been asked if I could imagine a time when I would be able to look back at those years with gratitude, I would have said that would be impossible.   

But here’s the thing.  Now, in the rearview mirror, I have the ability to see that God's grace  surrounded me when I was at my lowest.  Back then I didn't know how things would turn out but God knew the whole story.  He could see far enough around the bend to know that hope, healing, strength, endurance and health were up ahead for me. 

I certainly can't say everything in your life or in mine will turn out as this did for me.  What I say wholeheartedly is that I have come out of a storm and I feel grateful for the One who knew the whole story and stood with me until I was able to see His grace through it all.  I even can say I am grateful it happened because God broke down my walls and softened by heart.  He has shown me His mercy though so many people.  My life will forever be changed.  The yellow flowers that brought me joy and the prayer card that reminded me to trust Jesus because He will be merciful were not only symbols of a trying time back then; they are gifts for today.   

I trust with a hopeful heart that you will experience the same as you look at 2020 in your rearview mirror.  

Thanks for reading. 

#RearviewMirrorPointOfView #Gratitude #HisGrace #2020Pondering #CarmodyStateOfMind

Coming home was a bit of an ordeal for me. Tom, Matt, and Jani were epic in doing all they could to lessen my pain. Still, it was a difficult day. Once in the door, I sat at the table to catch my breath and gather energy to make it to the bed they had prepared for me. I was shaky and had cried as I made my way to this point. I needed a pause and a few deep breaths to focus on the joy o...f being home. As I sat there, softly and gently Mr. Puggles approached me and snuggled between my legs to give me a hug. He stayed there with me as I calmed down. Neither Jani nor Matt encouraged him to do this. I believe he simply sensed where I was at and wanted to be balm for my tears. His stillness and presence soothed me. Today is Puggy's birthday. I celebrate this guy and all the joy he brings to Jani and Matt and so many of us! Happy Birthday Sweet Mr. Puggles!!!

Wonderful news! On Feb 26 I wrote about meeting someone while at therapy. She was here in rehab for a broken back. Our conversation led to her sharing with me about her deep desire to get home to her husband and cat. I found out today that A. gets to go home this Wed. Tb2G!!
Thank you for your prayers for her, someone you don't know and never will meet. Luke 6:38 comes to mind as I ponder your generosity of prayer "Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap: for the measure you give will be the measure you get back."
May our prayers continue for A. as she lives out her final days with her beloved hubby and cat.

The 4 days I was at Sleepover #1 (Snoq. Valley Hospital) I didn't get a shower. Then the 8 days I was at Sleepover #2 (Overlake Hospital) it took until the day before I was transferred to rehab before they gave me a shower. You can imagine how good my shower feels at Sleepover #3! I could have the most insensitive klutz showering me and I'd be in heaven!! However, that isn't my good fortune. I... have a beautiful soul, older than me, with English as her second language and bright smile as my hair and body washing attendant. She works long hours each day showering men and women in every condition of ill physical and mental health. This lovely woman is the epitome of gentleness and pastoral care. Though she says she doesn't go "to the church" her hands are the healing touch of Grace, her voice the sound of joy, her presence ointment for my soul. I understand that God is bigger than we can wrap our minds around. Church buildings can't contain His glory nor can even the most incredible mountain tops. But still it surprises me when the Holy shows up in humble places. If you are like me, we tend to want to keep holy moments in a box- in church/ temple or certain people that have lives very different from our own (which have days of doubt, wrong decisions, broken limbs, throbbing headaches, unkempt promises, uncertainty, missteps, ...the list goes on). My beautiful shower friend has reminded me that although we do have to do our part in our relationship with God, sometimes God will come to us. All we need to do is to sit under the faucet of grace and let the warm water of cleansing, peace and healing wash over us. #GodIsNear #HealingWater #CarmodyStateOfMind

Just curious....what are your plans for Lent?

Tomorrow is the beginning of Lent. As I have considered how to hold this season holy, it seems obvious that I will be living my Lent in stillness, prayer, offering up some of my pain for others and giving up alcohol (certainly not having a glass of wine while on pain meds is a good idea). Yet, tugging at my heart is a bigger truth. God is good! I may be in pain but God is with me in this. The...re may be darkness in the world but God has redeemed the world and in Him there is Light and Life. Although on the surface the easy answer for a Lenton practice is to keep doing what I am doing, however I have noticed that each morning I am brought a breakfast tray with a cup of tea on it. In the Spirit of God's goodness and my current physical limitations, perhaps the practice of "Embracing A World Of Possibilities" for these 40 days of Lent is more what I am being led to ponder. I am guessing yes.
Just curious....what are your plans for Lent?
#Godisgood #EmbracingPossibilities #CarmodyStateOfMind

41st Wedding Anniversary

Some years I have talked about his faithfulness. Other years how he makes me laugh. I've also remarked how Tom Carmody has been the face of God for me year in and year out. With the past year in our rear view mirror, today on our 41st wedding anniversary, the words to Jason Aldean 's song " You Make It Easy" come to mind..."You're my sunshine in the darkest days, my better half, my saving grace.... You make me who I wanna be. You make it easy." For all that has been since we walked down the aisle on March 4, 1978, I say "Thank you, Tom". For all that will be in the years ahead, "I Can't Wait!" You are my heart, my laughter, my home. Happy Anniversary, best friend. I love you.
#CarmodyStateofMind #grateful #luckyinlove #41andcounting

Spoiler Alert! Preaching Post!
So, did you get out of bed by yourself? Perhaps take a shower, make breakfast, grab a cup of coffee, and head into your day without anyone's assistance? Three weeks ago, I would have replied yes to all of these questions and, for that matter, taken them all for granted. Currently I need help with all these tasks. I don't tell you this for sympathy. I am surround...ed by wonderful caregivers. I simply want to invite you (and me) to take a moment to be grateful for the simple pleasures we enjoy....walking, reaching, holding, climbing, sitting down, standing up. To Jesus, Yahweh, our Higher Power or who ever you give thanks, may THIS MOMENT not pass without a whisper of gratitude for ALL that has been given. We are blessed indeed.